week 3|2017

Posted on by kelley

blackwomanmirror

You are beautiful, but is that all to you? What does your heart look like? How do you treat people? What lies within your soul? You are beautiful, but aren’t we all? What is there to you besides your beauty? –Karen Owusu

photo ©Aea Baba

 

27 thoughts on “week 3|2017”

  1. As a father of an adolescent girl, it’s hard to tell ladies exactly what you just said in this short poem. Considering they have unrealistic expectations of beauty shoved in their face since birth and somehow spokeswoman who don’t look like any other women becomes the self appointed voice of women (talking bout Beyonce) then I feel like it’s up to y’all as women to change this culture. Stop idolizing these women. Men already dog you ladies so much but y’all don’t need to do it to each other. 😆

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    1. I agree with you! Take away Beyoncé’s platform and what do we have? A regularass chick! LMAO I am not that woman idolizing anyone. Believe me, as a teen, Janet and Whitney were the most beautiful women in the world! I prayed I’d have a smile like Janet when I got my braces off lol. But as an adult, I take them at face value and understand they are just human like me. They are entertainers here to entertain! Not gods! Not saviors! But it’s hard to tell even grown women that in the age of cyberbullying where you can get your throat snatched just for saying you don’t care for Bey’s Lemonade! It’s silly, really.

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      1. Yes and yes. Dr. Garland and I both had this conversation and we both agreed that if Beyonce looked like Serena Williams….. well you know how that story ends. My point is I feel strongly women must hold other women’s feet to the fire. Because it seems to be based off looks and image. Women who were never “traditionally beautiful” by American standards has always had a feminist mind state or a formidable mindstate. Now it seems image based and pretty girls don’t want to be slut shamed. Women mature very fast and young. But I know it’s not all equal and it’s mostly due on looks.

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        1. Right! It has to be based on popularity too because people don’t want to be outcast for not liking her or whatever’s popular. Don’t get me wrong, B is talented and pretty, but I know her brand was created to perpetuate european standards of beauty and what we should all strive to be instead of embracing and applauding our naturalness and individuality.

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    2. I don’t have enough hands to clap as loudly as I would like to for this comment. I was just telling a friend of mine how sad it is how some women try and publicly rank beauty; even within the natural hair community. I see so many photo captions with comments like “now THIS is a bomb natural fro” and other subliminals. I just wish that we could show love to one another instead of always making something a competition. Or without shaming each other for not being comfortable ‘natural.’ Like you said, many of us have unrealistic expectations of beauty from the media, celebs, etc. We should be helping each other rid of those expectations, and encouraging each other to see the truth and beauty in embracing ourselves. Not shaming each other for not doing it/not doing it “the best.”

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  2. I agree with Tareau Barron in that as women we do need to change the culture of accepting certain types of what has been perceived as beauty and attempt to emulate that when what is important in having true beauty is having a heart, empathy and compassion for one another instead of tearing each other down. There is too much of that going on, as it is.

    Thank you for this post Kelley. It does make one stop and think and reflect on what we value more, so-called ‘outer beauty’ which is transient or having a beautiful soul that automatically reflects beauty from inward, outward.

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    1. Thank you, Shelby. I agree. There are pretty faces everywhere but very few who have compassion or can engage in meaningful conversations (I’m speaking of men as well). Sure, one can look great but that’s not going to last. Your impression on people is what lasts.

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  4. This was beautiful. I stay aiming to clean up the inside because I know when the looks fade it has to be something deeper. Even before the looks fade…it’s sad how many women are content with looking their flyest but never attempt in changing their nasty personalities.

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  6. Yes ma’am Ms. Kelley! Remind us about what’s real😘
    Mama used to say “Pretty is as pretty does.” She was most proud of generosity and good behavior…she was NEVER impressed when people talked about folks being pretty✨

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  8. Kindness, a willingness to help others, slamming potato salad, a great eye for fashion…it’s hard to talk about your can dos. Head space is often taking up by can’ts and don’t haves. I am a work in progress. I intend on improving my list.

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      1. It’s like in an interview, when asked to tell a little about yourself. You think of yourself in terms of the job opening. You omit stuff more personal knitting, cooking, sewing, shopping. Yes, shopping is a skill to do it well you must spend little and get more. But we say, I’m a team player, I take initiative. I plan to change that response very soon just based on this new principle. Thank you.

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