Why You Should Date Someone Who Scares the S*** Out of You, A List — Shan Tell’em

I often hear the comparison of an amorous relationship to a job: it’s work. And with your dream career or any job you want to keep, you show up, do your best and get rewarded with money, health benefits, PTO, accolades, experiences, a 401k, a corner office, a growing salary, etc. And if you’re really really fortunate, this work is also fulfilling; it’s challenging. It gives you a sense of purpose. It allows you the freedom to bring your unique ideas to the table. You feel appreciated, supported and welcomed. It enhances other parts of your life. The great days far outnumber the not so good. And it would take some time to adjust if you suddenly lost that job or got demoted, right? For many, that’s a scary thought.

The same should go for a healthy partnership; although they’re ofttimes not portrayed to be nearly as valuable as a job, worthwhile relationships are priceless with endless benefits. It should not feel strenuous, but rather rewarding to have a person that loves you and comforts you yet challenges you. Sees the best in you and is there to steer you right when you lose your way. A person that accepts your dark, not so likeable side. A person that forgives you and loves with understandable conditions.


The person who is for you just might scare you into bettering your communication. You just might scare him into making healthier decisions and reaching his highest potential. Good! Know that it’s worth staying instead of running back to safety; when it comes to partnerships, a partner who fights for (not with) you and the relationship is truly as good as it gets. And I know everything is temporary, but it’s so worth it to cultivate something worth losing in the meantime. You deserve it! No mediocre!

Shantell breaks it down perfectly via Why You Should Date Someone Who Scares the S*** Out of You, A List — Shan Tell’em

People will say they want true love, stare it right in the face and run the other way. They don’t always run because they are on bulls***, but due to fear. The fear of ACTUALLY being loved the way they should be. The fear of getting what you hoped for and messing it all […]

photo found via search engine; no copyright infringement intended.

11 thoughts on “Why You Should Date Someone Who Scares the S*** Out of You, A List — Shan Tell’em

  1. I’m learning this relationship thing. I definitely feel more comfortable being in the known than the unknown. By that, at times I say to myself, “I’ll be good all by myself, doing me. I love the way I do things when I’m by myself.” But comfort stunts growth. This is off subject but on subject (if that makes any sense), but I didn’t buy a couch for my apartment for the first two years because I felt like comfort is for people who have everything they want and need. Not to say that I didn’t have everything I wanted but since I am so goal oriented, I didn’t feel like I had time to sit down. My point is that I kept going back and forward with myself about being in a relationship or not. Should I stick to my comfort zone and do me or start something new and see where it takes me. I chose the latter and only time will tell if it was a wise decision. But all experiences should teach you something. Sorry, I’m rambling on.

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