My mentor called me lazy and complacent.
And …he’s right. Kinda.
Even though he favors Obama, Omar is not a yes we can! kinda man. He is kind and well-meaning and has been in my shoes, yes, but he’s also a straight shooter—the perfect combo to push me through the slumps. And before meeting him, I didn’t realize how much I needed that specific kind of guidance.
What does it mean to become complacent?complacent. Someone who is complacent has become overly content — the junk-food-eating couch potato might be feeling complacent about his health. The literal meaning of this word’s Latin root is “very pleased,” but even though complacent people may seem pleased with themselves, we are rarely pleased with them.
Second of all tho, I’m not complacent. I am satisfied with myself as a human, but know as a businesswoman and artist, I need to give more of myself. My circle is filled with Black business women who either work a 9to5, work both corporately and independently or solely maintain their small business and family full-time. The problem is we are all on the same entrepreneurship rollercoaster, feeling similar highlights and pitfalls on the ride—mere reflections of each other. We’re all patting each other on the back, high fiving and yelling you can do it! when times are good; hugging and you got this‘ing our way through the rough patches. And that support is a b s o l u t e l y necessary, but I don’t think enough of us are sharing those hard-hitting truths like Omar. I need my You Go Girls right alongside hold-up-why-isn’t-this-done?! with the healthy helping of a side eye mentor. Self-motivating can be so hard sometimes—in life and in business—so a good team (even if they’re not your friends!) is necessary for those days when you just don’t wanna.
Make sure you are not the weapon formed against yourself that is causing you not to prosper.
Remember grades 1-12 where if you didn’t ask questions for understanding, listen or do the work, the outcome was failing grades and stagnation? Same in life! Whether your teacher and parents were encouraging or demeaning, it was up to you to do you best because ultimately, it impacted your life so much more than it did theirs. Again, same in life!
There are a million reasons you can’t ________, but I promise it’s most likely just you in your own way. (I’m speaking to myself here, too. Actually, I’m speaking to myself all up + through this thang!) Last time Omar and I met, it took me over two months to accomplish the “homework” he gave me; this last meeting, I took just four days! A lot of great things result from sacrifice, determination and focus. And a workable plan. Answer that interview question of What are your greatest strengths? Weaknesses? and ask for help in the areas you’re lacking. Your circle should include those who push you to do better and are on their own path of betterment. Hold onto people that want the best for you. Know and live like you’re capable and worthy.