week 33

In order to tap into your true potential, you have to let go of fear. The mind is a powerful tool because it allows you to create your own reality just through thoughtsspeakit and feelings. For example, the simply going back to a memory, you are able to trigger emotions and feelings that correlate with that memory, and with just one thought, you’re able to influence the mood or your day—whether it’s positive or negative. Going back to that moment, you start to think where this feeling arises and you can literally think yourself into a bad or good mood. This just proves that our mind is capable of so much more once we are able to master it. You are constantly creating your reality—subconsciously or consciously—through the frequencies you’re emitting. It’s all about how you respond to your thoughts that will determine what you will attract into your life. If you can master your mind, you are able to tap into your true potential/higher self and live life as an observer rather than someone who is simply responding to his environment.

@seekthetruth (with grammar revisions)

Words have power, even the words that stay in your head.
So be mindful.
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week 27: Honesty is Healing

Many gems were dropped this weekend at 4:45, a conversation and art exhibition. The theme was the state of relations between Black women and Black men with back burner influence from The Carters'(Bey and Jay) upcoming tour and their past albums: Lemonade and 4:44. Although I’ve yet to listen to either album, I like how the host tied it all together to moderate such a necessary conversation.

I always desire to see more brothers present in these spaces, but we were lucky to have Free on the panel. Like I said, there were gems all over, but when asked what is healing? What is healing? We hear the word so much but what IS it??, Free simply said “honesty is healing”. Y’all, that statement stuck. It’s my biggest takeaway from this experience.

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I take it literally: if you are honest with yourself, you will heal. Honest means finding and admitting the roots of your issues. It means knowing why certain things make you angry or why you feel so empty. It means no one will get a smile out of you today because, dammit, you just don’t have the energy to give one. Being honest is saying no when you want to say no and saying yes when you want to say yes. Honesty is sharing these truths with your tribe so they know what tf is up.

Simple enough, right??

Wrong! I understand we wear different masks in different settings, but when it comes to a point where you cannot even remove it in the presence of the ones who (are supposed to) accept you or in your home, that’s a problem. The truth behind the mask is silenced. And too many of us are not honest that there is an actual issue… or we’re dishonest about what the issue is or how it affects us. Then comes the burnout, the exhaustion and  resentment from having to be someone you’re not.

The thing you fear most has no power. Your fear of it is what has the power. Facing the truth really will set you free.-Oprah Winfrey

Whyyyyyy do we do this? I say because it’s familiar, comfortable. Maybe all we know is pain or silence. Maybe we are fearful of being left alone in the darkness if we are more truthful about who we are, what hurts us and what we want. I’ve been that little girl, scared to tell my grandma my shoes were too tight for fear of being given something to cry about. (Her words.) I’ve been that young woman, treading lightly—careful not to mention my big goals, just so I could get a second date. Pretty sad, right. The good thing that I learned early (early 20s) is that yes, people will be intimidated by women who are intelligent, confident, articulate, headstrong and ambitious who (seemingly) don’t need them. BUT it will intrigue others who are secure with themselves—men who know they can be a good friend, a dependable partner and a great lover. The vibe is similar for those platonic friends or business acquaintances you attract.

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The result of 4:45 is to recognize what we need and give whatever that is to ourselves which, of course, will allow others to pour into us properly. This work is a continuous evolution, a never-ending commitment to bettering ourselves and growing. Black men and Black women are invaluable to one another, but we have to put in the work to maintain positive bonds, and I think the work starts with being honest. As mentioned in a recent post, you can’t heal what you don’t reveal, right.

What do you think, family? How do you define healing? What could we use most right now? What could you use most?

P.S. Please give Antres, Rochelle and Free a read and a follow for more content like this.
Happy healing ❤
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I wince. Stifle a sigh.

Surely even over the phone you could hear my eyes close to cool the burn of incessant tears.

At this point, we both know an “I’m ok” is insufficient.

Matter of fact, a blatant lie.

Just days after you threaten to stop your own heart from beating.

You’ve always had this shoulder, these legs to hold you up, this heart to cry on. So why deny my hand so we can walk through hell together? Again. Why wait until you’re bursting, suffocating, drowning… and there are no arms long enough to pull you out?

So freely the L word flows when you’re ready to go, but no word on why. Why now? What’s wrong?

How many more conversations will start with evasion and end with denial? Should I stop asking how you’re doing, Liar? I care so I keep asking ..only to be stung. I don’t like being stung.

I wince. Silently sigh. Surely you can hear my eyes squeeze shut to cool the burn of incessant tears.

If you really wanted to end it all, you would have done it. No need to express your love for the last time. Make a liar out of me, Liar, and just do it. Let us find your body and weep for you.

But that’s not your style.

Instead you send out a warning shot to see who runs. Who proves they love you enough to make you want to give life another go.

But to answer you again, yes.

YES.

God, yes.

My selfish heart would ache for the loss of you. But it surely aches now for the fact that you know I can see through your masks of lies and lifeless smiles…

yet you continue to fix your lips to say “I’m ok.”


This piece was written with an old friend in mind who was contemplating suicide. I wrote it a few months ago, revised it a few hours ago + finally decided to share. These are just my honest words of love, frustration and helplessness inspired by this excerpt from Koko Boocro:

We hide behind the masks we wear from things we fear to acknowledge and reveal.

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Black features are beautiful. Black women are not.

mrksprm

Black features are beautiful. Black women are not. White women are paragons of virtue and desire. Black women are objects of fetishism and brutality.

This, at least, seems to be the mentality surrounding black femininity and beauty in a society built upon eurocentric beauty standards. While white women are praised for altering their bodies, plumping their lips, and tanning their skin, black women are shamed although the same features exist on them naturally.

This double standard is one string in the netting that surrounds black female sexuality — a web that entraps black women when they claim sexual agency. Deeply ingrained into culture is the notion that black female bodies, at the intersect of oppression, are less than human and therefore unattractive.

illustration: Markus Prime
reblogged from fighting misogynoir
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STRANG(ER) FRUIT

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Strange fruit now covering the streets

Juice bleeding black, dropping at my feet

Black bodies dropping with each new day

Quickly becoming the amerikkkan way

Blatant bleaching of the stars & stripes

Profiles to fit all stereotypes

Cries for justice fall on deaf ears

We be the victims of their fears

Here is the fruit to swallow whole

To satisfy desire, to consume souls

To taste sweet malice, to savor spite

Here is a strange & bitter delight

Randi Gloss

inspired by Strange Fruit, 1939

photo: Lawrence Beitler, 1930

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week 09 || 2016

side tattyou are a woman. so full of life. learn more about yourself. do not wait for anyone. for any man to promise you forever. to carry your blood. to call you beautiful. you are woman. you are magic. you wear enough pain. you bleed enough. you should already know who you are before the arrival of any man in your life. {©karen owusu}

{photo cred: Ashley Brielle, pinterest}

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week 06 || 2016

lmtlssPronoia

Psychology

Pronoia is a neologism that is defined as the opposite state of mind to paranoia: having the sense that there is a conspiracy that exists to help the person. It is also used to describe a philosophy that the world is set up to secretly benefit people.Wikipedia
And if we break it down, pro-, of course, means supporting; favoring. And -noia is defined as thought; (condition of the) mind or will.
I’ve been getting plenty of those tingly pronoia feelings these last few months, but I’ve always said the universe is working in your favor, girl! Yessssss!  And I’ll probably just continue to say that because pronoia sounds like I need to work on my paranoia pronunciation. Interesting nonetheless.

Is the universe working in your favor?

[photo cred: getty images] 
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